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Narey's Toepoker

Worst signings of the 2023/24 Premiership season (part 1)

Ah, it's that time of year again. I don't have much time for blogging these days, but I will always try and make an exception for this. The eleven previous 'winners' of our Worst Signing award: 2012/13: Rory Boulding (Kilmarnock) 2013/14: Stephane Bahoken (St. Mirren) 2014/15: Jim Fenlon (Ross County) 2015/16: Rodney Sneijder (Dundee United) 2016/17: Joey Barton (Rangers) 2017/18: Eduardo Herrera (Rangers) 2018/19: Umar Sadiq (Rangers) 2019/20: Madis Vihmann (St. Johnstone) 2020/21: Shane Duff
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Narey's Toepoker

Picking Scotland's Euro 2024 squad

It's still more than six months until Euro 2024, and the draw hasn't even been made yet. So of course it's far, far too early to think about who will be in Steve Clarke's squad for the finals. But I'm not going to let that stop me. Rather than just list twenty-three names (current info suggests that the squad size will be cut back to what it was before Covid and Euro 2020), I'm going to break things down by position and look at what options there are, as well as who is most likely to be on the p
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Narey's Toepoker

Dodds was a symptom of Caley Thistle's problems - and this is their last chance to fix them

Maybe it was the realisation that Billy Dodds couldn't even beat Raith Rovers that was the end of him. For what it's worth, Caley Thistle only lost to a late goal away from home to a club who went top of the Championship as a result of their victory. And by all accounts the visitors put on their best performance of the season and squandered numerous chances of their own. But Inverness had this absolutely mental record against Rovers where in twenty-three years and thirty-four competitive match
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Narey's Toepoker

2023/24 Scottish Premiership preview

The Premiership increasingly feels like three separate leagues due to the vast financial disparities...so that's how I'm going to treat it for this season's preview... THE OLD FIRM/GLASGOW DERBY (delete as applicable) TIER  (Finishing outwith the top two, or even less than ten points ahead of third should result in manager and entire squad being hanged, drawn and quartered) CELTIC: they say you should never go back, but for Brendan Rodgers I think an exception can be made. Celtic can be pret
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Narey's Toepoker

2023/24 Scottish Championship preview

God, I hate the Scottish Championship. My club have been stuck in this particular circle of hell since 2017 and I'm desperate for us to get out of it. And the more time that passes the more likely it is that my wish will be granted...but with a move downward rather than up. After all there's always someone worse off than you...and it's Falkirk. The usual script for this league is as follows; one club has a decent financial advantage over all the others, and that club gets promoted. The last co
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Narey's Toepoker

2023/24 Scottish League One Preview

Whereas in League Two the difference in budget between richest and poorest is pretty minimal, League One has four clubs who are full time - Cove Rangers, Falkirk, Hamilton Accies and Queen of the South - and six clubs who savour bloodying their noses regularly. So while I make no apology for my choice of the top four it is quite easy to see it going spectacularly wrong for each of them. Take FALKIRK, for example. It's like the Bairns have been given a special demotivational plaque by Mr Burns.
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Narey's Toepoker

2023/24 Scottish League Two preview

With no moneybags team in League Two right now it's decidedly harder to predict who is going to win it. Last season I suggested Forfar Athletic, who ended up looking like relegation candidates until they changed manager. Having a good (or terrible) boss, or being the team with the striker that scores twenty goals are the sort of factors that can have an exponential effect at this level. And so we segue rather clumsily straight onto ELGIN CITY, who nearly finished bottom last season and have ma
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Narey's Toepoker

The sixteenth annual Narey's Toepoker Team Of The Year (part 2)

I said I'd get it done 'eventually', didn't I? CENTRAL MIDFIELDERS: CALLUM MCGREGOR (CELTIC), REO HATATE (CELTIC) Honourable mentions: Leighton Clarkson (Aberdeen), Ylber Ramadani (Aberdeen), Cammy Devlin (Heart of Midlothian), Ryan Jack (Rangers), Keanu Baccus (St. Mirren), Mark O'Hara (St. Mirren) I desperately wanted to not flood the team with Celtic players. And reader, I failed miserably. Trying to shoehorn anyone in ahead of McGregor and Hatate here would have made me a laughing stock.
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Narey's Toepoker

The sixteenth annual Narey's Toepoker Team Of The Year (part 1)

I've done this every year for sixteen years, and to be honest it's never felt more like a chore. When you don't have any skin in the game - that's six years Caley Thistle have been stuck in the Championship - it becomes even harder to be motivated by watching Celtic and Rangers pump everybody. It's also more difficult than ever to pick players from other clubs for this XI, because I'm very close to crossing the 'taking the p***' line' by doing so. Still, I've tried my best. For historical reco
Narey's Toepoker

Worst signings of the 2022/23 Premiership season (part 2)

Top ten time! Here's the countdown from 25 to 11, if you missed it. 10. JOHN SOUTTAR (RANGERS) There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and John Souttar getting injured. Inevitably Soapy got crocked on his Rangers debut and was missing for eight months; giving him an Old Firm game at Celtic Park for his first start felt like a disaster waiting to happen and so it proved with the centre-back gifting a goal with a dreadful backpass. Rangers need a reliable partner for Connor Goldson; Sou
Narey's Toepoker

Worst signings of the 2022/23 Premiership season (part 1)

So I don't have the time to blog much these days. But this series has been going on since 2012/13 and I'm worried that the world will end if I stop. Also, people tend to enjoy it; there's something so very Scottish Football about fans complaining that their team's duffer isn't at the top of my list. The ten previous winners, by the way: 2012/13: Rory Boulding (Kilmarnock) 2013/14: Stephane Bahoken (St. Mirren) 2014/15: Jim Fenlon (Ross County) 2015/16: Rodney Sneijder (Dundee United) 2016/17:
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Narey's Toepoker

The state of Scottish football going into 2023

At one end of the scale, Scottish football finances are in rude health. Celtic and Rangers both reached the promised land of the Champions League group stages this season, which means megabucks. Whilst Rangers have had some interesting spending habits over much of the last decade, this along with the sale of Calvin Bassey will surely leave them no longer dependent on the riches of Douglas Park. But 2023 could be a very difficult year for a number of Scottish football clubs. The main reason for
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Narey's Toepoker

2022-23 Premiership preview

To be honest, these days the Premiership preview is a slog to write. That's partly because my own team aren't in it, partly because I don't have the time to do pieces on individual clubs anymore and partly because for my entire football life it has been either a one horse or two horse race. And a race like that isn't interesting unless you're backing one of the two horses, So I'm happy to accept that this is a bit thin and fully expect to be quickly proved wrong on most of it before the clocks g
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Narey's Toepoker

2022-23 Championship preview

Here we go then. The Scottish Championship is my bread and butter, by which I mean that I make the same blunders as in all the other previews but with much more confidence. Allegations that I predicted Arbroath to finish bottom last season and Dunfermline to make the playoffs (no,not those playoffs) are absolutely outrageous and completely true. In recent times this division has tended to be dominated by a single club who clearly have more cash to throw at the squad. Out of the last eight cham
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Narey's Toepoker

2022-23 League One preview

As someone with a wicked sense of humour and a deep love of schadenfreude, League One will doubtless bring me lots of joy every season as long as my own team aren't stuck in it. It's a beautiful combination of full-time clubs who feel the seaside leagues are beneath them - and whose players too often play as if they feel the same - and part-time sides who range from battle-hardened, dangerous units to a complete omnishambles (sometimes both in the same season) with everything in between. It se
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Narey's Toepoker

2022-23 League Two preview

Those of you who have read my previews before (all three of you) will know that I put a large onus on budget as a factor in how well clubs will do. And with good reason. After all, last season League Two had Kelty Hearts; the season before that there was Queen's Park, who won the title by 16 points in a campaign only 22 games long; in 2019-20 Cove Rangers were 13 points clear when the final quarter was written off.  And for 2022-23 we have, well, nobody who really stands out. Which should mean a
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Narey's Toepoker

The fifteenth annual Narey's Toepoker Team Of The Year (part 2)

The keeper and back four can be found here. We're going 4-2-3-1 this year, as for some reason none of the strikers in this league could hit Adam Rooney levels of goalscoring, let along Michael Higdon levels. On the other hand, the midfield could get a bit over-run and there may be more wingers than there are wings. Still, it's my site and my rules, so there. CENTRAL MIDFIELD: CALLUM MCGREGOR (CELTIC), JOE ARIBO (RANGERS) Honourable mentions: Lewis Ferguson (Aberdeen), David Turnbull (Ce
Narey's Toepoker

The fifteenth annual Narey's Toepoker Team Of The Year (part 1)

So when I first did one of these, Gordon Brown was Prime Minister, I had a hairline that was still within communicating distance of my forehead and Allan McGregor was playing for Rangers. What? Oh.  Anyway, this is the fifteenth annual Team Of The Year. Here's the previous fourteen. I regret nothing. Except Daniel Majstorovic, but that goes without saying. 2007/08: Allan McGregor (Rangers), Alan Hutton (Rangers), Carlos Cuellar (Rangers), Lee Wilkie (Dundee United), Lee Naylor (Celtic),
Narey's Toepoker

Worst Signings of the 2021/22 Premiership season (part 2)

The players ranked 25 to 11 can be found here. Before we move on, there has to be an honourable mention for Caleb Chukwuemeka, whose exploits for Livingston had escaped me before I published the first part of this double-bill. Chukwuemeka, on loan from Aston Villa, suffered the ignominy of being subbed just seven minutes after coming off the bench against Aberdeen with David Martindale criticising his work-rate. That was less than a month after arriving; the forward has made a couple of appe
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Narey's Toepoker

Worst Signings of the 2021/22 Premiership season (part 1)

Ten years I've been doing this. Man, there have been some duffers. Here, for the record, are the nine previous 'winners': 2012/13: Rory Boulding (Kilmarnock) 2013/14: Stephane Bahoken (St. Mirren) 2014/15: Jim Fenlon (Ross County) 2015/16: Rodney Sneijder (Dundee United) 2016/17: Joey Barton (Rangers) 2017/18: Eduardo Herrera (Rangers) 2018/19: Umar Sadiq (Rangers) 2019/20: Madis Vihmann (St. Johnstone) 2020/21: Shane Duffy (Celtic) Here we go for year 10, with the countdown from 25
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Across the Pond

Picture This

I have been taking pictures at BMO field, in the stands since the opening season in 2007. Getting the camera into BMO Field has always been an issue, so much so that for the first few seasons I carried not only a printout of the BMO and TFC camera policies but also a letter from Paul Beirne specifically noting that cameras were permissible for personal use and that my use had been verified as such. This website exists for friends and fans alike, its personal rather than professional and I never
Scotty

Scotty

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Narey's Toepoker

The Championship - Second Quarter Report

I did it for the first 9 games, so the law dictates that I have to do it again: here's a look at the second quarter of the Championship season. ARBROATH    A+ First, a caveat: whilst Arbroath are indeed part-time, this is not a bunch of guys playing for expenses money and a post-game booze up. Dick Campbell's squad contains plenty of players who could - should - be at full-time clubs but who probably make more money from the combination of football and a day job than plenty of ful
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Narey's Toepoker

The Championship - First Quarter Report

I don't care what anyone else says, the Championship is the most interesting division in the SPFL. What's that you say? "You're only saying that because the team you support is top of the table"? That's an outrageous allegation that I can neither confirm nor deny at this time. We are now nine games, or one quarter, of the way through the season. So here's a breakdown of how the ten clubs are faring, with a grading system shamelessly stolen from the legendary Tell Him He's Pele site of years
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    • Inverness CT -V- Raith Rovers - Preview

      Inverness CT -V- Raith Rovers - Preview

      tm4tj posted an article in Previews 2023-24,

      The great escape coninues on Friday night at the Caledonian Stadium as we host Raith Rovers in a game that will also be screened live on BBC Scotland with Raith trying to cling on to the coat tails of Dundee United and the Caley Jags looking to slither away from the play-off zone. What could possibly go wrong? Savage and Carragher will be joined in the squad by a welcome returnee in Sean McAllister who has returned fit from Everton after about six weeks out. That's a nice wee bonus for Big Dunc. However, he has the wrath from Arbroath after his "tools down" comment in his pre-match interview. As long as he has not got the wrath from Raith. Keep the faith!
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    • Queens Park 0-1 Inverness CT - Report

      Queens Park 0-1 Inverness CT - Report

      tm4tj posted an article in Reports 2023-24,

      Massive: Just under 1500 fans rattled around inside the national stadium for the proverbial six-pointer at the bottom of the table with Inverness looking to get out of the play-off place and Queens one point ahead at the start of the game. In a tense first half Cammy Harper scored a stunning free kick after Cillian Sheridan had handled 25 yards out. Boom! That's how it ended despite QP upping their game in the second period as Inverness kept them at bay.
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    • Queens Park -V- Inverness CT - Preview

      Queens Park -V- Inverness CT - Preview

      tm4tj posted an article in Previews 2023-24,

      Hampden Calling: Carragher is now a doubt after feeling his hamstring. Other than that not much has changed apart from Remi Savage, who has not recovered after he got a boot in the face from Cammy Kerr. Apparently Kerr's boot is OK but Savage is suffering from minor concussion and will miss the next couple of games. Maybe that was Kerr ensuring he gets a game this weekend.
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    • Inverness CT 2-1 Arbroath - Report

      Inverness CT 2-1 Arbroath - Report

      tm4tj posted an article in Reports 2023-24,

      Smokies Kippered: On a blustery day more akin to AA Milne and Winnie the Pooh, Arbroath and Inverness battled it out to see who would get the final nails hammered into their coffins. Arbroath were in the last chance snug in the last chance saloon, whilst Inverness have one foot in the grave. I don't believe it! Arbroath tried everything, they even took their own wind with them. However, they had Murray, Bird and Slater on from the start but O'Brien missed out. Zak Delaney also started for the Red Lichties. A bright opening spell saw Alex Samuel denied twice inside five minutes. Once by a combination of Max Boruc and his crossbar, the second by Boruc on his own as Samuel got his shot away from inside the box. Wallace Duffy got the goal we deserved on the interval as he drove across the keeper from the right side of the box to put us in ahead at the break. Leighton McIntosh restored parity on the hour as he drilled home from eighteen yards, but Alex Samuel won the points with a late strike to all but relegate ten man Arbroath who had Ricky Little sent off.
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    • Inverness CT -V- Arbroath - Preview

      Inverness CT -V- Arbroath - Preview

      tm4tj posted an article in Previews 2023-24,

      It's Now or Never: That's what Elvis used to say. We are in deep trouble up to our necks with no signs that we can turn this around. Defeat to Arbroath could be the final nail in our coffin with only fifteen points available to us ahead of this game. The play-offs are looking more likely by the minute, but it's not beyond the realms of possibilty that automatic relegation is still an option should Arbroath beat us on Saturday. With the long suffering fans rapidly losing faith in Big Dunc, it's crunch time as Arbroath head North to the venue they won at the last time they were here. Sadly they come to the Caledonian Stadium off the back of a 2-1 midweek defeat to Airdrie, and we could all but relegate them on Saturday with a win. However, that's nothing to gloat about as we could be next...
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