broomie boy

There was a prison break and I saw a dwarf climbing up the fence. As he jumped down he sneered at me and I thought, well that's a little condescending. Will glass coffins be a success? Remains to be seen My neighbours named their newly born baby "saturn". Not my idea of a child's name but it does have a ring to it. After a series of crimes in the Glasgow area, Chief Inspector McTavish has announced that he is looking for a man with one eye. If he doesn't find him, he's going to use both eyes

Rainbow

girders

Grounded

Edinburgh ( big team :) )

king

confused

shocked

Obese

Slavers

Question

Grass

A Yorkshireman's wife dies. He arranges the funeral, purchases a headstone and goes to see the engraver. "All I want on it" He says "is MY DARLING WIFE, SHE WERE THINE". The engraver tells him no problem, come back tomorrow. The following morning he returns and is shown the headstone. MY DARLING WIFE, SHE WERE THIN. "You've forgotten the E" The Yorkshire man sobs. The engraver apologises and tells him to come back in an hour. An hour later he returns and is shown the headstone. MY DARLING WIFE, EEEEEEE SHE WERE THIN

Three Italian nuns die and go to heaven where they are met by St. Peter at the pearly gates. St. Peter says "Ladies, you all led such wonderful lives, that I'm granting you six months to go back to Earth and be anyone you want". The first nun says, "I want to be Sophia Loren" and POOF she's gone. The second says, "I want to be Madonna" and POOF she's gone. The third says, "I want to be Sara Pipalini". St. Peter looks perplexed. "Who?" he says. "Sara Pipalini" replies the nun. St. Peter shakes his head and says, "I'm sorry, that name just doesn't ring a bell." The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it to St. Peter. He reads the paper and starts laughing. "No Sister, he laughs, this says 'Sahara Pipeline, laid by 500 men in 7 days'!"

summer

movies

change

Double

Perve

follow

Organs

Tunnel ( end of the )

pardon

golf

Rosberg now retires , strange decision , , ( as my boss used to say.......... Keith , success is a journey not a destination )