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Never Chase Yer Money


Canada Bob

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In an attempt to turn the tide of bad luck brought on by Man City and that horse that's still running, I was daft enough to throw a shed full of money at Bradford Bulls last night, I got 4/9 from Corals, everyone else had them 4/11 or even 1/3.

Looked like a good thing, famous last words hey, so I lumped on them with the thought that being down Manchester last

night with 3 of the Wigin Lads we'd watch the game in one of the pubs, that's where it all started to come unstuck.

We were intended to park up near Victoria Station, but that "Dancing on Ice" was on at the MEN Centre, so you couldn't get a parking spot anywhere near there, so we drove around for a bit and found a back street and left the car there.

Walked/ran into town to find a pub to watch the game, first pub dint even have a telly, so we turned on our heels and headed off down the street to find another pub, they had a telly, not switched on, so we bought some ale {by this time it's 10 past 8, the kick off was at 8, and we asks the landlord to put the telly on, only to find he don't have Sky, FFS.

I should have known the night wouldn't get any better, by 8:30 we're in another pub, same story, so deciding to give up on the running around as the bet was a safe bet we stay there and have a few pints Jacky was the dedicated driver, so the rest of us can have a few.

Once we figured that the match must be over we start making phone calls, only to find that we've all burned our money.

"Inexplicably" they threw the ball, and the game...

That took the edge off our "party" so we with our tales between our legs we decide we'll head for that chippy back in Wigan. Great idea, if only we can find the fekkin car, none of us could remember the street, we finished up walking round for over an hour trying to retrace our tracks, {it gets better}, we finally turn a corner and find the car, easy enough once we were on the right street, it stood out a mile, Jacky had left the fekkin lights on, for 4 *riggin hours.

Car wouldn't start, but thankfully Jacky is in the AA, they arrived 40 minutes later, by the time we got back to Wigin even the Police Station was shut, let alone the chippy, what a fekkin night, next time they ask me out I'm staying home...

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Aye, I'll take what ever's going, {thanks 5th}...

We had a ride to York, {280 miles round trip}, the wife an' her sister wanted to visit York Minster, and that Eden Camp place in Malton {WWII prisoner of war thing}, worth a visit if yer ever around that area, 'specially if yer an owd fogey like me that can rmember ration books etc. They have lots of wartime memorabilia there, including a Spitfire, a T34 Russian tanks, a doodle bug and all sorts of stuff.

Eden Camp...

I stayed well away from any Bettin' Shops today, I've done enough in in the last week or so, like the Italians who spent their time at Eden Camp I've had enough of the battle for now, I think I'll give betting a rest until we get back to Canada in May and I get Sid's System back up and running...

Edited by Canada Bob
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Aye, I'll take what ever's going, {thanks 5th}...

We had a ride to York, {280 miles round trip}, the wife an' her sister wanted to visit York Minster, and that Eden Camp place in Malton {WWII prisoner of war thing}, worth a visit if yer ever around that area, 'specially if yer an owd fogey like me that can rmember ration books etc. They have lots of wartime memorabilia there, including a Spitfire, a T34 Russian tanks, a doodle bug and all sorts of stuff.

Eden Camp...

I stayed well away from any Bettin' Shops today, I've done enough in in the last week or so, like the Italians who spent their time at Eden Camp I've had enough of the battle for now, I think I'll give betting a rest until we get back to Canada in May and I get Sid's System back up and running...

I've done York Cathedral and Eden Camp, and was impressed by both of them. I also did a Ghost Walk around York that was brilliant. I was at nearby Linton on Ouse at time(incidentally, that same trip I also did Leeds War Museum that was fantastic).

Shame to see that you are not getting your returns, now I'm not saying the following is true, but maybe life has decided that in return for you getting the all clear, it's gonna screw you on the bets? Similar to Stephen Hawking?

Who knows eh? All I know is that I would rather be losing my money and having an ale, then be stuck off coast of Angola drinking water on my birthday. Nae ******* cake either.

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I've done York Cathedral and Eden Camp, and was impressed by both of them. I also did a Ghost Walk around York that was brilliant. I was at nearby Linton on Ouse at time(incidentally, that same trip I also did Leeds War Museum that was fantastic).

Yea, we did the Mad Alice ghost walk a few years ago, she was great, but looks like she's moved on the now, lots of others doing the same stuff now though, but Mad Alice was well worth the fiver...

Shame to see that you are not getting your returns, now I'm not saying the following is true, but maybe life has decided that in return for you getting the all clear, it's gonna screw you on the bets? Similar to Stephen Hawking?

Yea, I hear you, if you have to lose something better yer money than yer life, Dick Turpin had that figured out...

Who knows eh? All I know is that I would rather be losing my money and having an ale, then be stuck off coast of Angola drinking water on my birthday. Nae ******* cake either.

Not one of them Pirates are yer ? what's the fishing like then ?

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I've done York Cathedral and Eden Camp, and was impressed by both of them. I also did a Ghost Walk around York that was brilliant. I was at nearby Linton on Ouse at time(incidentally, that same trip I also did Leeds War Museum that was fantastic).

Yea, we did the Mad Alice ghost walk a few years ago, she was great, but looks like she's moved on the now, lots of others doing the same stuff now though, but Mad Alice was well worth the fiver...

Shame to see that you are not getting your returns, now I'm not saying the following is true, but maybe life has decided that in return for you getting the all clear, it's gonna screw you on the bets? Similar to Stephen Hawking?

Yea, I hear you, if you have to lose something better yer money than yer life, Dick Turpin had that figured out...

Who knows eh? All I know is that I would rather be losing my money and having an ale, then be stuck off coast of Angola drinking water on my birthday. Nae ******* cake either.

Not one of them Pirates are yer ? what's the fishing like then ?

I couldn't tell you which one I did as I was quite young and it wasn't organised by me. Aye, life can be a bitch sometime, but hey, things are on the up right?

I'm no one of those pirates (arrrrgggghhhh) I'm on the wrong side for all that. Though that are some attacks in Nigeria, Angola is actually pretty good. I don't do fishing (officially we aren't allowed) but on the last ship I was on down here, in the same place, they were catching some decent sized Tuna. The problem is, they taste like **** because of all the crap that is put in the water by all the platforms and ships that are round here.

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Similar to Stephen Hawking?

Looks like his number is up now...

Hawking seriously ill...

All I know is that I would rather be losing my money and having an ale, then be stuck off coast of Angola drinking water on my birthday. Nae ******* cake either.

Never been to Angola, closest was Namibia, and that was nowt to look at...

I'm no one of those pirates (arrrrgggghhhh) I'm on the wrong side for all that.

Though that are some attacks in Nigeria, Angola is actually pretty good.

Yea, I know a couple of lads working in Nigeria, one up some river or other, the other offshore...

By the way, what's the mosquito situation like out there ?

I don't do fishing (officially we aren't allowed) but on the last ship I was on down here, in the same place, they were catching some decent sized Tuna. The problem is, they taste like **** because of all the crap that is put in the water by all the platforms and ships that are round here.

Warm water don't make for fish that are worth eating, the colder the better for the most part, some decent stuff off Nova Scotia & Newfoundland, including Tuna, you'll bend yer rod out there on the rigs...

Don't know if the money would match what yer getting in Angola, but there's still lots of work going on the rigs in and around Canada, and there'll be no end to it once they start tapping into that "Ice that Burns" weird stuff that is, ever come across it {Methane Hydrate}. Canada {alone} has enough of it to keep North America running for the next 3,000 years. A lad I used to work with was working on the Joides Resolution {built in Dartmouth, Nova Scotia, some 30 years ago}, he brought a bit of the stuff into the Granite House {in Halifax}, rolled it out of a flask into an ash tray and set fire to it, great "party trick", amazing stuff.

Odd how you feel that yer missing out being in Angola, I spent the afternoon in the pub in Wigin, and wanted to go to the Burnley v Sheffield United game, but they all wanted to go home to watch it on the telly, where's the fun in that.

I'd have gone but it aint the same when yer on yer own, so I'll go watch the game in the Highlands pub next door...

I'm on Sheffield United @ 7/4, for what it's worth...

Edited by Canada Bob
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Sinking further into the mire, Sheffield United looked knackered, never had a serious attempt on goal.

What does it take to turn the tide FFS...

Bugger the horses and the soccer, I think I'll have a few quid on "sorry" tomorrow, and an EW on "boom & bust".

C'mon "Sorry"...

Be nice to know what he'd written down wouldn't it, Oh to be a Labour MP tonight hey, or better still his speech maker.

Edited by Canada Bob
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I think I'll give betting a rest until we get back to Canada in May and I get Sid's System back up and running...

:thumb04: :018:

Yea, the Blades cut me throat tonight, that's for sure, I did a monkey in on that :rotflmao:

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I can't pick a winner on the soccer and the horses I bet go lame, so...

For the hell of it, I'll see if I can pick a winner out of Ladbrokes list...

Climate Change 1/5

G20 1/4

Low Carbon 1/4

Recovery 1/4

Stamp Duty 1/3

Difficult Times 1/2

Recession 1/2

Real Help 1/2

Downturn 4/7

Fiscal Stimulus 4/7

Value For Money 4/7

Slowdown 4/6

Tax Haven evens

IMF 6/4

Quantitative Easing 5/2

Credit Crunch 3/1

Hard Working Families 5/1

Obama 5/1

Green Shoots 6/1

Golden Rule 7/1

Sorry 10/1

Depression 16/1

Boom and Bust 20/1

Election 20/1

Gambling 25/1

Bathplug 100/1

Butcher 250/1

Just listening to that r sole Meddlesome on the telly, he's just mantioned "recession" 8 times in about 3 minutes, so it looks like that horse is in form...

Edited by Canada Bob
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5/1 is very generous for "Hard Working Families", as it seems to have be a compulsory sound bite for any economic speech/interview over the last 10 years.

In fact if they could offer 10/1 on "for hard working families everywhere" I'd stick my negative equity on it.

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Tell you what, I think that "Gambling" is a fair bet @ 25/1, check the link below...

Go for it Alisair, grab the Bookies money

Remember that all he has to do is mention the word Gambling at any point in his speech, a speech that is likely to last around an hour, he may mention it in reference to Bookies, Banksor anything else, don't matter long as he says the word.

Edited by Canada Bob
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Ladbrokes have a decent bet -

How long will the Budget speech last?

Under 55 mins 5/6

55 mins or over 5/6

I would of thought it will be near or over an hour with the current economic climate

Colour of tie I think will be red @ 7/4 or black @ good odds of 25/1

BBC have loads of info,etc and even exactly what was said ( To say at anytime ) in last years Budget

If your really keen on a bet, and want to research......................

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Would Ladbrokes accept a multi-billion pound bet on "Bathplug" at 100/1 from 11 Downing Street? It's the only way he'll be able to bail out the economy.

I've asked Ladbrokes, they say they will take as much money as you want on Bathplug, but at Ante Post rules, so if Bathplug gets pulled you money goes down the drain...

On the other hand, if Bathplug goes in, Ladbrokes will go t*ts up, but, seeing that they are a High Street icon the Government will be obliged to bail them out, if that happens we'll all be taking a bath...

PS... I'll be on "Gambling" I'll take what I can get on at 25/1 on that...

Edited by Canada Bob
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If your really keen on a bet, and want to research...

I've had a look at what Darling has said in the last year or so in his budget type speeches, and what his office say on their web site. People are creatures of habit when it comes to patterns of speech, Politicians even more so when it comes to drumming their ideology into the rest of us. As an example, who dreampt up that propaganda phrase "Credit Crunch" that's now on everyone's lips. How clever was that ! it steers our minds and our concerns away from talking about Recession or worse Depression.

As long as Gormless Gordon, Meddlesome Mendelson et-al can bridle our tongues and turn our heads to see the world as they want us to see it, they maintain control.

Anyway, I digress, here's a list of words that Alistair has mentioned at least 4 times in {near every} budget type speech he has made in the last year...

Downturn: a 4/7 chance, 4 times at least in 5 speeches.

Recovery: a 1/4 chance, as many as 6 times in one speech, and never yet missed the word in a budget type speech.

Recession: a 1/2 chance, this is his favourite buzz word, best bet of all the odds on chances, 8 times in one speech.

Credit Crunch: a 3/1 chance, is out of form, only used once in a formal/budget type speech.

Difficult Times: a 1/2 chance, don't do well on this {formal speech} course, having won only once in 5 outings.

Knob: a Palm Sister colt out of Home Secretary, at 33/1 represents value, although he tends to fade when challenged he has been known to spurt at the finish. Hasn't performed all that well when ridden by J.Smith who seems to have trouble doing the weight, even though the colt has a ?10 penalty from his last outing.

Bollocks: a Meddlesome Mendelson mare rumoured to be out of Two Jags, tried to hang left on several occasions but seems ungenuine, at 50/1 is the proverbial talking horse with an ability that almost matches the sires good looks.

Knackered: a Socialist gelding, sired by NuLabour, now owned by "The Workers", will unfortunately be carrying top weight {again} is easy to back at 100/1 and typically represents the syndicates chance.

Formcast:

With some persuasion from the whip Knob may find his action, if he does he'll go in, and Bollocks won't be far behind, after that Knackered is almost a certainty...

Edited by Canada Bob
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