dumpmaster

Ho Ho Ho has anyone seen my Santa costume

There is an old saying that helped me through troubled times.

It is better to have loved and lost,than never to have loved at all.

Or-  women! can't live with them, can't shoot them

Do farts have lumps in them? If no I am in rather smelly trouble

Russel Latapy! Now that man just oozed class, and the amount of times he took the pee pee out of our defense beggars belief.

Some parents can be so cruel with the naming of their kids

http://www.waynekerrmusic.com/

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I play for a welfare cricket team here in Inverness, and I have been asked to find a couple of new recruits for our team.

So just wondered if any one who uses this forum has any cricket skills in them and if so would they be interested in playing in a local team?

Why do you not mind the smell of your own farts  :024:

Wombles! They are satans own creation and should be removed from our planet using any means  (nuclear weapons included)

Just grin if you don't know the words to the Chuckle brothers song

October 2 years ago was in Florida, and just as we were walking into a Disney theme park I spotted 2 young guys wearing ICT tops,I asked them if they new the score from the Rangers game and when I heard about Baynes winning goal, a lot of the americans must have thought I was a holidaymaker with a screw loose as I did go a wee bit mental  :001:

What a great holiday that was ......

English football pundits

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If I was being totally ruthless and honest, the following players would be surplus to requirements.

Dennis - Yes I know he is a legend and our top scorer of all time,and he is a confidence player bla bla but he has no pace and his skills do not stand out as they used to in the lower divisions.

Bayne- Always gives 110% but thats not enough for me,we always seem to resort to the long ball game when he is playing ,and most of the time his challenges result in nothing more than free kicks to our opponents.

Rory - Sorry the lad has been given ample time and even when out on loan he still looked out of his depth(prove me wrong elsewhere Rory)

Tokely - Go on  boo hiss me all you want ,but the guy is a lumbering oaf who looks as fit as Johnny Vegas and as mobile as Long John Silver.Why he was offered a new deal I don't know maybe he has some dodgy pictures of the ICT board with naked ferrets and he blackmailed them ;

Paatelainen- He huffs and he puffs but he never blows the house down,I just don't think he has the end product to play at this level.

McBain- Love the guy to bits and he has a great engine on him but how often do we see him failing to deliver a cross in?  as he can't use his right foot.

Now there others I know that I could add to my "hit list" but these names are the ones that stand out,and  in my view if the club wants to move forward these are the players that should be looked at for changing for the greater good of the club.

Shona (private joke between Smee and I )

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I use Lynx anyone want to sniff me !