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Narey's Toepoker

A Premiership season preview (of sorts)

In years gone by, I've knocked off individual previews for each top flight club and published them in the days leading up to the new campaign. Obviously, this hasn't happened this time around. There are reasons for that. These include personal circumstances, a lack of a League Cup group stage to give pointers on how clubs are doing, the fact that the extended transfer window is likely to mean big changes between now and October, and definitely an element of 'I just can't be a***d'. However I
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Narey's Toepoker

The problem isn't Hearts, or Dundee United, or any other club. It's the system

It is not fair that Hearts, Partick Thistle and Stranraer were relegated from their respective divisions without having played out the full season, nor that as a consequence they face significant financial pressures going forward. They are quite right to legally challenge this decision. It is outrageous that there is any question of Dundee United, Raith Rovers and Cove Rangers being denied promotion. It is also outrageous that these clubs are having to fund legal teams of their own to defend th
Narey's Toepoker

The problem isn't Hearts, or Dundee United, or any other club. It's the system

It is not fair that Hearts, Partick Thistle and Stranraer were relegated from their respective divisions without having played out the full season, nor that as a consequence they face significant financial pressures going forward. They are quite right to legally challenge this decision. It is outrageous that there is any question of Dundee United, Raith Rovers and Cove Rangers being denied promotion. It is also outrageous that these clubs are having to fund legal teams of their own to defend th
Narey's Toepoker

The thirteenth annual Narey's Toepoker Team Of The Year (part 2)

Yes, I know, it's all a bit half-assed this year. Here's the midfield and forwards. And I explained last week why I don't consider Mohamed Elyounoussi a candidate for this. CENTRAL MIDFIELDERS: CALLUM MCGREGOR (CELTIC), ALI MCCANN (ST. JOHNSTONE) Honourable mentions: Alex Gogic (Hamilton Academical), Liam Donnelly (Motherwell), Lewis Ferguson (Aberdeen), Marvin Bartley (Livingston) McGregor is the easy pick, of course. His form seemed to dip a little when Neil Lennon returned, but this season
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

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Narey's Toepoker

The thirteenth annual Narey's Toepoker Team Of The Year (part 2)

Yes, I know, it's all a bit half-assed this year. Here's the midfield and forwards. And I explained last week why I don't consider Mohamed Elyounoussi a candidate for this. CENTRAL MIDFIELDERS: CALLUM MCGREGOR (CELTIC), ALI MCCANN (ST. JOHNSTONE) Honourable mentions: Alex Gogic (Hamilton Academical), Liam Donnelly (Motherwell), Lewis Ferguson (Aberdeen), Marvin Bartley (Livingston) McGregor is the easy pick, of course. His form seemed to dip a little when Neil Lennon returned, but this season
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Narey's Toepoker

The thirteenth annual Narey's Toepoker Team Of The Year (part 1)

Better late than never, I suppose. Usually my Team Of The Year goes up in April, but with everything else that's going on it had fallen by the wayside. But I was spurred into action by the SPFL's own 'voted for by fans' effort. Sake. I mean, Mohamed Elyounoussi made all of seven starts and three sub appearances in the league this season. Jeremie Frimpong played twelve games. I know the season was cut short, but I'm not having that...nor a vote that ends up with players from only the two
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Narey's Toepoker

The thirteenth annual Narey's Toepoker Team Of The Year (part 1)

Better late than never, I suppose. Usually my Team Of The Year goes up in April, but with everything else that's going on it had fallen by the wayside. But I was spurred into action by the SPFL's own 'voted for by fans' effort. Sake. I mean, Mohamed Elyounoussi made all of seven starts and three sub appearances in the league this season. Jeremie Frimpong played twelve games. I know the season was cut short, but I'm not having that...nor a vote that ends up with players from only the two c
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Narey's Toepoker

My Euro 2020 Scotland squad

As you will all be acutely aware, in a Covid-free universe the Scotland National Team would have marched inexorably through the spring playoffs and into Euro 2020. Israel at home? Pah. We managed to beat Israel at home with Alex McLeish in charge. Israel are so cack that James Forrest scored a hat-trick against them. And then Norway away, probably. Sure, Erling Haaland looks like a bit of a player, but he looks to be the perfect size and shape for Charlie Mulgrew's back pocket. Besides, Norway
Narey's Toepoker

My Euro 2020 Scotland squad

As you will all be acutely aware, in a Covid-free universe the Scotland National Team would have marched inexorably through the spring playoffs and into Euro 2020. Israel at home? Pah. We managed to beat Israel at home with Alex McLeish in charge. Israel are so cack that James Forrest scored a hat-trick against them. And then Norway away, probably. Sure, Erling Haaland looks like a bit of a player, but he looks to be the perfect size and shape for Charlie Mulgrew's back pocket. Besides, Norway
Narey's Toepoker

The SPFL's biggest challenge is yet to come, and there is little to suggest they can face it down

The phrase 'club statement' now fills one with almost as much dread as 'root canal surgery', or 'Andy Halliday at left-back'. There have been exceptions - Stenhousemuir and Kelty Hearts leading the way - but most cases have involved people who think they're cleverer than they are and who have too much time on their hands using the word 'dignity' whilst throwing it away spectacularly in a multi-paragraphed ranting word salad. It would be nice to think that the result of today's vote on having
Narey's Toepoker

The SPFL's biggest challenge is yet to come, and there is little to suggest they can face it down

The phrase 'club statement' now fills one with almost as much dread as 'root canal surgery', or 'Andy Halliday at left-back'. There have been exceptions - Stenhousemuir and Kelty Hearts leading the way - but most cases have involved people who think they're cleverer than they are and who have too much time on their hands using the word 'dignity' whilst throwing it away spectacularly in a multi-paragraphed ranting word salad. It would be nice to think that the result of today's vote on having
Narey's Toepoker

Worst Signings of the 2019/20 Premiership season (part 2)

Part one of this, which counts down from 25 to 11, can be found here. As ever, the top ten is dominated by whichever club has drastically underachieved that season. No prizes for guessing which side occupies more spots than any other, though not the top one. And for the first time in four seasons, it isn't a Rangers player who 'leads' these standings. Onward... data:image/jpeg;base64,/9j/4AAQSkZJRgABAQAAAQABAAD/2wCEAAkGBxMTEhUTEhMWFhUXFhcXFxcYFxgXFxUYFxgYFxgYFxgYHSggGBolGxcVITEhJSkrLi4uFx8
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Narey's Toepoker

Worst Signings of the 2019/20 Premiership season (part 2)

Part one of this, which counts down from 25 to 11, can be found here. As ever, the top ten is dominated by whichever club has drastically underachieved that season. No prizes for guessing which side occupies more spots than any other, though not the top one. And for the first time in four seasons, it isn't a Rangers player who 'leads' these standings. Onward... 10. SIMEON JACKSON (KILMARNOCK) The Canadian international hardly impressed at St. Mirren last season, but Kilmarnock were so des
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Narey's Toepoker

Worst Signings of the 2019/20 Premiership season (part 1)

This is the eighth season we've done this. Whilst football has come to a standstill I don't believe it entitles these players (or the clubs that signed them) a stay of execution. The halt to matches has probably spared some - particularly January arrivals) - from appearing on this list simply because there wasn't enough evidence of them being crap. But that didn't mean we were short of folk to choose from... As a reminder, here are the previous seven 'winners': 2012/13 - Rory Boulding (K
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Narey's Toepoker

Worst Signings of the 2019/20 Premiership season (part 1)

This is the eighth season we've done this. Whilst football has come to a standstill I don't believe it entitles these players (or the clubs that signed them) a stay of execution. The halt to matches has probably spared some - particularly January arrivals) - from appearing on this list simply because there wasn't enough evidence of them being crap. But that didn't mean we were short of folk to choose from... As a reminder, here are the previous seven 'winners': 2012/13 - Rory Boulding (K
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Narey's Toepoker

Covid-19 and cashflow - how will Scottish clubs get through this?

It's been, what, two weeks without football? The withdrawal is already so bad that I gave in to the Football Manager 2020 free trial; after 12 years on the wagon I'm now obsessing about how to get Weymouth out of the National League South. Either I pay full whack for the game or I face being locked in my childhood bedroom for a week being fed nothing but pea soup. Choose life, choose a job, choose a career, choose '4-2-4 wing play custom route one'. But my tremors and nightsweats are nothing co
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Narey's Toepoker

Covid-19 and cashflow - how will Scottish clubs get through this?

It's been, what, two weeks without football? The withdrawal is already so bad that I gave in to the Football Manager 2020 free trial; after 12 years on the wagon I'm now obsessing about how to get Weymouth out of the National League South. Either I pay full whack for the game or I face being locked in my childhood bedroom for a week being fed nothing but pea soup. Choose life, choose a job, choose a career, choose '4-2-4 wing play custom route one'. But my tremors and nightsweats are nothing co
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Narey's Toepoker

How coronavirus could affect Scottish football

In case you haven't noticed, Covid-19 (let's be a bit pedantic and call it that, since there are plenty of other coronaviruses of varying severity, including causes of the common cold) is coming. At the time of writing there are 27 cases in Scotland, but that number is going to increase impressively. For what it's worth it seems to me (from my day job perspective as a GP) that the powers that be are dealing with things pretty appropriately at the moment. I'm not an expert in virology or epidemi
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Narey's Toepoker

How coronavirus could affect Scottish football

In case you haven't noticed, Covid-19 (let's be a bit pedantic and call it that, since there are plenty of other coronaviruses of varying severity, including causes of the common cold) is coming. At the time of writing there are 27 cases in Scotland, but that number is going to increase impressively. For what it's worth it seems to me (from my day job perspective as a GP) that the powers that be are dealing with things pretty appropriately at the moment. I'm not an expert in virology or epidemi
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Moving The Goalposts

My Gran Could Play in the Scottish Premier League

Lower League Ramblings Here I am again, baring my soul for all you lot to see. Yes I watch Love Island. I’m not proud of it but I live for the drama in the villa and I make sure I rush home to watch it every night. Like everyone else I am praying for them to chuck in a wee ugly fat guy from Greenock with incredible patter to represent our fine nation in front of millions. My prayers have not been answered. Instead they have chucked in an Edinburgh born hunk of a man, tattoos covering his chest
TheMantis

TheMantis

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Football adventures with James Rendall

My mate Fabian

This is a piece that has been penned with a view to publication in Scottish football periodical Nutmeg No.16 in the summer about my friend Fabian Yantorno. The mere mention of the word Uruguay in a footballing context might still send shivers down the spine of Scotland fans of a certain age. The scars following the clash between the two nations at the World Cup in 1986 in Mexico live long in the memory, as well as with those immortal words of the late, great Hugh McIlvanney “These Uruguayans a
tm4tj

tm4tj

0
Narey's Toepoker

Scottish football finances - 2020 edition

On the one hand, it must be noted that these figures are essentially a year old, as they are for the 2018/19 season. There can also be pretty legitimate reasons for clubs either losing money or not making as much as expected, such as investment in infrastructure. On the other hand, we now have access to the 2018/19 season accounts for eighteen of Scotland's twenty-two full-time SPFL clubs (assuming no-one is counting Airdrie as full-time yet). We also have an idea of what's to come in two other
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0
Narey's Toepoker

Scottish football finances - 2020 edition

On the one hand, it must be noted that these figures are essentially a year old, as they are for the 2018/19 season. There can also be pretty legitimate reasons for clubs either losing money or not making as much as expected, such as investment in infrastructure. On the other hand, we now have access to the 2018/19 season accounts for eighteen of Scotland's twenty-two full-time SPFL clubs (assuming no-one is counting Airdrie as full-time yet). We also have an idea of what's to come in two other
hislopsoffsideagain

hislopsoffsideagain

0

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  • Our picks

    • Celtic 3-1 Inverness CT - Scottish Cup Final

      Celtic 3-1 Inverness CT - Scottish Cup Final

      tm4tj posted an article in Reports 2022-23,

      Best for Inverness on a difficult day was Wallace Duffy. What an invitingly sumptuous cross for Dan Mackay to power in a diving header. Cammy Harper on the other flank was equally impressive against Celtic's wide players and in midfield David Carson and Sean Welsh battled hard to stem the possession that Celtic were always going to dominate. We struggled up front working off scraps but substitute Dan Mackay scored that brilliant late power header to give us hope, albeit only fleeting. In general our defence stood firm for large parts of the game, seemingly working to a plan. Much better than many Premiership teams fared this season. Nobody hid in this game but we were restricted to what we could by a quality treble winning side. Blood, sweat and tears of pride.

      As the season draws to a close we will not see so many of these guys here next season, but it has been an abstract pleasure reporting on our once again rollercoaster of a season.

      See you all back refreshed for 23/24. 
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    • Celtic -V- Inverness CT - Scottish Cup Final

      The wait is over

      tm4tj posted an article in Previews 2022-23,

      The wait is over: Having lain idle since the 5th of May Championship flop against Ayr United, the long wait for the Scottish Cup Final is over for the Caley Jags. I imagine the stattos amongst us will be searching their Guiness Book of Records to find out the biggest winning margin in the Scottish Cup Final. I'll save you the bother. Renton 6-1 v Cambuslang on 4th February 1888. Or, ominously, Celtic 6-1 Hibernian on 6th May 1972. Are we about to change records?
      Win or lose, I hope you all enjoy the occasion. 
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    • Falkirk 0-3 Inverness CT - Scottish Cup Semi Final

      Falkirk 0-3 Inverness CT - Scottish Cup Semi Final

      tm4tj posted an article in Reports 2022-23,

      Semi-Final Joy: With a VAR assisted penalty, Billy Mckay opened the scoring early in the first half. Dan Mackay headed in the second from an inviting Jay Henderson Cross. Falkirk had their moments, Callumn Morrison hitting the post after some defensive indecision on the edge of the box. However, we did our own post hitting and Billy Mckay wrapped up the victory in the second half with a well taken finish, his 100th goal for the Caley Jags. That ensured our progress into the final. Nathan Shaw was unfortunate twice off the post and Falkirk were denied a consolation by some dogged defending. All in, comfortable in the end and Hampden calling once more.
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    • Falkirk -V- Inverness CT - Scottish Cup Semi Final

      Falkirk -V- Inverness CT - Scottish Cup Semi Final

      tm4tj posted an article in Previews 2022-23,

      The last time we played Falkirk at Hampden in front of 37,000 fans, it was a history making event. I don't really need to tell you how that worked out, but for those that were on another planet, we won the Scottish Cup by beating Falkirk 2-1. Since then both clubs have underachieved and hit the skids. Falkirk are now trying to get themselves out of league 1 and we are desperately trying to keep ourselves in the Premiership play-off slot after a horrendous season littered with injuries to the whole squad. A third round struggle past Stirling Albion before we went through to the 5th round by default against Queens Park, but since then have comfortably disposed of Premiership opposition in Livingston and Kilmarnock. Falkirk got here by putting six past Wick Academy before a narrow 2-1 win at Alloa. They then dumped media darlings Darvel 5-1 and in the quarter final put out Ayr United. On paper we will be the bookies favourites. That's not something we are normally comfortable with and I fully expect Falkirk will also fancy their chances in this one, and rightly so. Be warned!
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    • Inverness CT 1-1 Dundee - Report

      Inverness CT 1-1 Dundee - Report

      tm4tj posted an article in Reports 2022-23,

      Applause for Tommy Cumming set the scene on a dry but breezy afternoon. As it panned out it ended all square. Dundee were quick out of the blocks and pestered Mark Ridgers early on without creating the clear cut chance to open the scoring. Level at the break, the Dark Blues continued in the same vein after the break and made the breakthrough on the hour when Lyall Cameron scored. However we have been resilient of late and substitute Austin Samuels earned us a point with fifteen minutes remaining as we came back at Dundee to quieten their raucous support who firmly believe Billy is a short rotund person born out of wedlock!
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