absent friend

strategically vented

Joseph

rashes to

carrying companion

Gents Toilets

On my reading of this thread we now have four ICT supporters and four Dons supporters in our company! So that will be six pies - one each for us and a half each for them. Let's face it, it is the only crumbs they will pick up tonight! :015:

from his

Over to FW!!

Hundreds of pies! I hope not or the bairns milk money will be spent next week as well! I'll pretend I am from Aberdeen and cut them in four!

eyes watering

I was at Pittodrie on Monday night doing a bit of opposition watching and came away from the game rather optimistic regarding our chances. I think, on Monday night's showing that ICT could have all six points if these two teams play as they did on Monday. Good passing in the middle of the park but very little penetration up front. Mackie very easily eased off the ball - headless chicken the rest of the time - Miller strong and makes good runs but if well marked a ***** cat! Hibs, in my opinion, mark the wee Morrocan out of the game, as Hart did, and they don't flow the same. I hope I am correct with my six points but 4 will do at the expense of this two teams.

It is the club nearest the stadium, right on the corner site. Parking/bus travel no big prob - two screens(big tellys not projector screens), one in each bar - drink cheap. If I get an indication of numbers I will supply the half time pies and Peter, the steward, has offered to heat them up.

Another option is the Bon Accord Golf Club, at Pittodrie. I have spoken to the steward and it is ok for Monday. Big screen Telly, no hassle with Dons 'fans' and if it is a goer we will have pies laid on. I will however require to know if it is to be used and the approx. numbers. Think about it and let me know.

A husband is at home watching the football when his wife asks, 'Honey could you fix the light in the hallway'? Not even looking up he replies, 'Do I have an electricians logo printed on my forehead? I dont think so! Two minutes later she ask, 'Could you fix the fridge door'? Eyes still on the TV he replies, 'Fix the fridge door? Does it lookn like i have Hotpoint written on my forehead? i dont think so'! Not even taking this hint say asks 'Could you at least fix the steps to the front door? They are about to break?' Angry tone now, 'I'm not a **** caprenter and i dont want to fix the steps, do I have chippie written on my forehead? I dont think so!' Having had enough he goes to watch the match in the pub. Four pints and a win for his team later,he feelingl guilty he makes his way home to find the step repaired, the light fixed and the fridge door perfect. Darling, he asks, How did all this get fixed She said 'Well when you left I sat outside and cried. Just then a nice young man asked me what was wrong and I told him. He offered to do all the repairs and all I had to do was go to bed with him or bake him a cake. The husband replied 'Oh what kind of cake did you bake him? She replies 'Hellooooo... Do you see Delia Smith written on my forehead? I dont think so.'

I stay in Aberdeen as well, up from the Atholl Hotel but as they don't have a TV screen I tend to go into the city centre - any pub. I agree that a group of us together supporting ICT will be better than sitting on your own being out supported by the locals. Is the Illicit Still up from M & S back door? (Or is that the Bond?) If it is the 'IS' that could be very central.

Well Alex, I don't remember my wayward balls getting me into trouble with the lovely Flora. Was she a not a west coast nurse at Raigmore?

Now Johnboy, I have been in training at this joke telling ever since you gave me pelters so don't try and undermine my confidence at this early stage of my learning! :019:

friend, Nigel

I think I understand this philosophy :017:, carrot and stick without the carrot. Don't encourage - that's for weaklings. Give them lots of criticism, now that should do the trick! :015:

The young barman looks up to find this really sexy lady walking up to him- she says in a sexy seductive voice, "May I please speak to your manager?" He, feeling natures stirrings, says, "Not right now, but is there anything I can help you with?" She replies, "I don't know if your the right man to talk to...its kind of personal..." More stirrings, he goes, "I'm pretty sure I can handle your problem, miss." She then looks at him with a smile, and slowly puts two of her fingers into his mouth...and began sliding them in and out of his wet lips. She asks, "Can you give the manager a little message for me?" The bartender nods expectantly...eyes bulging! "Tell him there's no toilet paper in the ladies loo." !

A burglar breaks in to a stately home and starts stuffing the family silver into his swag bag. A voice goes " Jesus is watching you, Jesus is watching you". The burglar stops and peers around the unlit the room but can't see anything so thinking he has imagined it he carries on stuffing the family silver into his bag. A voice, a little louder this time, goes "Jesus is watching you, Jesus is watching you". The burglar stops, turns on his torch and sees a parrot in a cage. He goes up to the parrot and says "Did you say that?", "Yes" replies the parrot. "You're a clever parrot, whats your name then?". "Moses" replies the parrot. "Thats a stupid name for a parrot isn't it" says the burglar. Wait for it ................... The parrot replies "Not as stupid as Jesus is for the Rottweiler".

of girl

arsh up

the doughrings

to back