The Pimpernel Organisation in an exclusive interview with Gordon Smith, SFA Chief Executive, is reliably-informed that commencing 1 January 2008 the following will be in place and players/responsible will be issued yellow cards:

Cheating/Diving infractions will be reviewed on a video tape within 72 hours of the game by that game's referee and yellow cards will be issued for infractions by diving to players who have got away with it unscathed during the game.

Similarly if a player has received a yellow card due to the fact that he was placed in a position of apparently fouling the opponent because the oppnent cheated,  his yellow card will be withdrawn (or may be) and in addition a yellow card will be issued to the opponent who caused the problem in the first place.

MR Smith in a forthright, absorbing, interview stated coolly and clearly that a review is currently undserway in the S.FA of all ssues such as this (see below) that have been creeping into the Scottish game and the object is to clean up the game in Scotland. :33:

Also, our representative spy, Kerosene Idiot-Insane, interviewed Mr Don McVicar, the SFA Head of Referee Development and we are pleased to advise that as a result of information obtained during  an incendiary interview we are now in a position to  advise that  the following issues will also be under intense scrutiny from now on:

1.Pushing, jostling , shoving and jersey pulling in the box during corners, free kicks etc--infractions here that are detected will result in penalties. Mr McVicar opined that some of the decisions by the Referee in this regard may prove to be controversial but did not explain  what measures the Committees had in mind to offset the is.

2.Brawls in which players come to the rescue of their poor little colleagues who have  been hit by opponents' powder puffs and  are aggrieved and upset resulting in massive brawls of 22 or more disgruntled, overexcited, players in indulging in unseemly spectacles will also be subject to strict unspecified disciplinary action.

3. Overcelebration by players who have scored a goal , by running into the crowd, etc, will be subject to ongoing  disciplinary action in some fashion, yellow cards etc, in order to avoid a situation where football police will in the future have to be formed, trained and paid to be on site.

Our organisation will continue to monitor these developments and will update the news as and when it occurs. Remember where you heard this breaking bombshell advisory  o this site first.

ICT Unofficial Web Site--where all the highest and the best news views and clips are ticker taping as you think and speak.

:022: :002:

About time Diving, Jostling and Jersey Pulling are to be clamped down on! Will the referees do it to the precious Old Firm though, They are the most guilty of all clubs who do these things.

If its not Bobo Balde (as a main suspect) and the rest of Celtic and Rangers' defences jumping over the top of players using opposition players shoulders as a stepladder its half the Celtic team diving all over the place every week.

Last seasons officiating of Inverness games certainly from what i saw at TCS was a joke, the amount of times teams from the south got let off by SOUTH BASED officials yet Inverness players just had to breath next to an opposing player and they were hauled up like a suspect criminal, it was the worst season for that IMO since we've been in the SPL. And yes some of the times we were guilty of it, I wont deny that, but it seemed at times like it was a power trip against us for some referees coming up here.

The pimples source would appear to be a good one...

nae mair cheatin?  :32: :33:

It'll be interesting to see if ref's uphold the shirt pulling, pushing, etc in the box directive as there are likely to be a dozen or so penalties a game  :023:

I'll believe it when I see it but it would be great if this actually happens.

The Lennon/Juanjo alleged headbut would have been a good place to start.

FIFA are now saying that using video evidence after the match would contravene their rules

Although the procedures will go in to place immediately, they don't take force until 1st January 2008.

On the surface it looks like a good move, however I have a couple of concerns.

1.  Is a referee reviewing the game afterwards likely to turn himself in for making bad decisions or missing incidents?

2.  It is the smaller teams who will (potentially) suffer most.  The larger teams have "larger" squads of players and will be better placed to absorb the impacts of these new procedures and will be able to take more risk on the cheating front.

3.  They have failed to cover the most important aspect of cheating and that is the impact it can have on the result of the game.  These new procedures will not be used to overturn any result and will only serve to punish individual players.  I would like to have seen the scheme extended to include some kind of points penalty for teams where there is an obvious issue with cheating or the ability to remove the goal if the cheating has resulted in a penalty or scoring directly from a free-kick.

The proposed scheme is better than what we have at the moment but I think it has room for improvement and tightening up.  As with many things it will only be as effective as is allowed by those who are administering it - unfortunately that's the SFA, fortunately it's not the SPL  :015:

Or mebbes no ....

Fifa say mebbes no

So there we have it....

"Footballs World Governing Body Protects Cheats"

SP ? ?Kerosene Idiot-Insane? ? made me laugh out loud.

CD ? ?These new procedures will only serve to punish individual players?

Not so, innocent defenders will be exonerated of wrongdoing on occasion.

Official disapprobation of the cheaters might just lead to a more honest and better game.

We could have scope for a 2nd un-official ?moral? league where goals resulting from ill won penalties and free kicks around the penalty area are discounted.

Dundee Utd Manager Craig Levein tonight criticised the anti cheating measures. Barry Robson is the Captain of Dundee Utd.

If this is against FIFA rules then FIFA rules are wrong.

CD ? ?These new procedures will only serve to punish individual players?

You should be careful Sophia.  Keep selectively quoting people (and not even full sentences) and people will start thinking your a journalist  :014:

So long as Sophia keeps on saying "unlike Queen Victoria I am amused" we can overlook her journalistic references. My reply is "you are awful...but I like you"!

Of course. Sophia it would have been most inappropriate to quote the real name of the reporter as Kheredine Idessane since the Pimple Organisation does not rely of reporters to glean their news, only home grown talent honed and nurtured at the "Hall" in Fort George  and who come up through the Pimpernel Organisation  ranks.

More scoops later--stay tuned to this frequency..... :016: :sillywave:

SP, whenever I see and hear from the bold Kerosene I recall one night in Glasgow and that his dulcet tones played a part.

Sorry CaleyD, I thought I had captured the flavour of your gist.

Please accept my apologies.

If its scoops you are after how about the name of Sciurus Vulgaris who has played all over Northern Europe as well as Asia.

the flavour of his what?

anyway, next the should punish players who shield the ball when its going out of play but have no intention of playing it. surely its obstruction?

Sophia

Kerosene in Glasgow? --was he whispering fiery protestations of passion in your lovely young ear or sumpin?

I will have to have a word with him-- "K,  don't protest, just put her feet to the fire, be a man of action and sweep her off her feet once they have been suitably warmed-up (er..so to speak).

Ja? "

Chas Bannnerman complains about my French,  LOL,  but he has not yet  heard me sing "The German Officers crossed the Rhine, caught the French girls and drank their wine etc"... and your sentences always intrigue me= so this is not a complaint.. :015:

Diving, jostling, jersey pulling, brawls etc., etc. are what the game is all about. Where would we be without feckin controversy ??  :001:

Well, IHE , here is one fer you...LOL

A report just in to the Hall at Fort George handed to me by Mz Moneypenelope states that Flood of  Dundee United was sent off today against Aberdeen for ....DIVING.

see separate thread.    :33: