For those that have not read Soccer Guy's reports from facebook on events at the World Cup. Here is his brilliant report on the Brazil v Scotland encounter...
Brazil Soccer Club go open up a can of awesome juice as the Salsa Guys go hand a super-sized L to the Soccer Nessies in Miami, crushing Scotch hopes of making it outta the little leagues.
The Nessies sucked right from the start, even dumbass deefense allowed Vinnie Shoes Junior to go get the go ahead. The same guy looked to have completed his double insertion a few minutes later only for the denial flag to save Scotch asses - but only for a little while longer, because in overtime at the end of the first quarter, the goaltender miscalculized a cross-pass that he should’ve made finger food, leaving Shoes to head kick into the ball bag.
Matty S. Cuba did another goalshot in the second quarter. Even though Mac Tommy Knee had a couple of head kicks inside the DBZ, Brazil Soccer Club just laughed at how lame they were. Coach Aintchalucky even had time to go bring out Nate Mar - their former MVP who now just goofs around and is always kinda hurt - outta the subshack.
This was a bad day of soccer for the Tarzan Army, like watching an unsuspecting prairie dog walking around sniffing out bugs and stuff when some big-ass eagle comes crashing in on their head, grabs it with its bird claws and carries it on up into the sky, little legs kicking like it’s thinking everything’s probably going to be okay, right up until the moment they realize this bird thing is actually gonna rip it open and start feeding its guts to its eagle babies. By the time the sun begins to dip, the story is already over. The grass keeps swaying. The burrows remain. The colony of prairies dogs carries on. And the only sign that the prairie dog was ever there is a brief shadow passing overhead, moving west with the evening light. Because the prairie doesn’t stop for one prairie dog. The wind still blows. The bugs still buzz. The other animals still wake up the next morning and get on with the business of being alive. And that’s the cruel thing about the World Cup World Championship of the world. It feels like the centre of the universe when your franchise is in it, but the moment they’re gone, it reveals itself for what it really is: an enormous prairie stretching far beyond the horizon. Brazil Soccer Club still roam. USMNT still hunt. The giants still cast their shadows. The tournament keeps rolling on beneath the same sun, indifferent to who got carried away and eaten by an eagle. Scotland Soccer Club’s little patch of dirt may be empty now - we gotta wait and see if they are eliminized - but the prairie barely notices. The show goes on. The eagle circles elsewhere, looking for its next meal.
By
tm4tj ·
Clach have announced that they are hosting us on Saturday 27 June, with the game kicking off at 1300.