Johnboy

Don't know - don't care.

Could be an interesting game with Inverness Ladies... Will they swop shirts at the end?

Presumably this is what CaleyKid was trying to post : Clicky

What's green and got four legs? Grass.

What's yellow, bent and points north? A magnetic banana...

cent Dare you!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Some more gems from the Master. Pele_is_God please note.... Chic wanders into a pet shop and asks the assistant for a pet wasp. The assistant replies that they don't stock them and they don't make good pets. Chic replies "But you've got two in the window!" A concerned onlooker approaches Chic after he slips on an icy pavement and falls on his rear. "Did you slip?" he replies "No - I'm trying to break a bar of toffee in my back pocket." "I walked into the bedroom. The curtains were drawn, but the bed was real." "I walked into a bar. Ouch." I was at the Olympic Games, in the Olympic Village and I saw a man walking towards me with a big stick on his shoulder. I said "are you a pole vaulter?" and he said "No, I'm a German and how did you know my name was Valter?"

The league might not be decided until the last day of the season, with ICT needing nothing more than a draw at home to Dundee to clinch promotion... It will be like deja vu, all over again!

Football fans can be the absolute pits. Story here

Shinnie and Nick Ross played against PT last September.... Although we lost that one 2-3, both these guys played very well, but unfortunately TB didn't seem to notice.

I think Pele-is-God's one about the wasp came from the late great, Chic Murray... Some of Chic's stuff here.... There's a ton more of it on Google. Visiting London, Chic was asked by a stranger, "Do you know the Battersea dog's home?". He replied, "I didn't even know it was away." We've got stained glass windows in our house. It's those damned pigeons. The police stopped me when I was out in my car. They told me it was a spot check. I admitted to two pimples and a boil. I went to the butchers to buy a leg of lamb. "Is it Scotch?", I asked. "Why?" the butcher said in reply. Are you going to talk to it or eat it?". "In that case, have you got any wild duck?". "No", he responded, "but I've got one I could aggravate for you". I rang the bell of this small bed-and breakfast place, whereupon a lady appeared at an outside window. "What do you want?", she asked. "I want to stay here", I replied. "Well, stay there then", she said and closed the window. I was out walking the other evening. This fellow accosted me, and asked if that was the moon up there in the sky. I replied that I had no idea as I was a stranger there myself. My wife went to a beauty parlour and got a mud pack. For two days she looked nice, then the mud fell off. She's a classy girl though, at least all her tattoos are spelt right. My next door neighbour said "Is it O.K. if I use your lawnmower?" I replied, "Certainly, just don't take it out of my garden!"

There's very little that separates the top 5 in Div1 from the bottom 5 in the SPL.... Time to think about league reconstruction again - hopefully heading to a bigger SPL - 14, or even 16, I reckon would be a big improvement.

For some reason that reminds me of an interview I heard on TV a few years ago, with the late jazz singer, George Melly.... Question - What changed you from homosexual to straight? Was it the love of a good woman? Answer - No, several bad ones!

I would say you've covered yourself pretty well with your comments above, Smee.... The buyer was taking a wee bit of a gamble here, and probably thought he was on to a good thing. If he had any doubts he should have taken a trip to Sneck to see it for himself.

Yes, he was inclined towards eccentricity on occasion... I was thinking more of the French cafe owner from 'Allo, 'Allo.

Bloody hell I never looked at that. How is that even possible? With Ren?, anything's possible....

In his team selection he's got Russel on the bench and Lionel playing in midfield....

flat

The set up at East End Park is very good too.... Fife people are just so much more enlightened.

So you'd drop Duncan, who's just played a couple of blinders (Motherwell & Raith) to bring Lionel in? This isn't one of your better wind ups, Ren

I was delighted to see Adam grab that vital first goal on Saturday... I've criticised him in the past for not challenging opposition keepers when they've received a passback. I certainly don't think it was a foul.

Yes, but with certain reservations.....

Didn't TB say not so long ago, that contract talks for anyone will not be taking place, until it becomes clear what division we will be in next season?

Not sure how you can say it looks likely O learned one. We're starting to get things together. Dundee are floundering. Its anyones league at the minute. Oh learned one! Very good Alex!! :) :015: :015:

FFS Knowledge... Have you seen some of the burdz that live down in DC's neck of the woods? I'd want danger money to live around that area...