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10 possibilities for you: - swap them for shares in The News of the World. - take them apart and them put them back together in a random order to make "30 or so" strange/abstract programs. - exchange each one for an item of confectionery worth no more than 74p and see what sweet treats you end up with. - place them inside the hymn books of your local church to help those who attend get through a Sunday service after an excessive Saturday night. - take them apart and wallpaper a single wall in your bathroom with the pages. - use them to give reading lessons to c*unty fans. - put them in a pile, cling film them together real tight and use the resulting firm brick type object to stand on to reach items on the top shelf. - hide them in your local neighbourhood and then create a treasure map with clues to find each one in date order. - develop altzhiemers or demenia so you forget all the details then you can give yourself a fresh football treat every time you read them. - glue several pages together, then cut them into squares to make a series of assorted ICT beer mats. The choice is yours really, do whatever your heart desires!

So myself and Caleyjag have been having problems with our Sky+HD box so we phoned Sky and they arranged to send an engineer out today to fix the house: Sky man: oh you're a Caley fan?!! Me: yip, certainly am Sky man: it was you lot that ended Celtics title challenge then Me: you could say that, are you a Celtic fan? Sky man: yeah, Celtic were terrible that night the worst I have ever seen them play Me: well you say that and just about everyone else that I have spoken to have said that but no one actually gives us credit for winning the game, I actually thought we played you off the park for most of the game and deserved a lot more credit than we got. Sky man: well, eh, yeah, maybe, eh, well, I'll just go out and get you a new box from the car The sense of superiority I got when he went back out to his car was amazing and I had to contain my laughter before he came back in. I think it was his use of 'you lot' that annoyed me and the fact he never even said hello before he came into the house. It made me sit and think about it and yes it was last season and I don't like to dwell but I really don't think we got the credit we deserved from others that aren't attributed to the club and fans. Hopefully we'll have more reasons to be cheerful this season coming and build on last season giving us even more to gloat about.

In other news a man was killed when the roof of the FC Twente stadium collapsed. Let's get some perspective here people.

Why are you speaking to staff at a Premier Inn about fixing your Sky+HD box?

I thought Eric was more of a donkey to be honest.

Phone the citizens advice, they will give you up to the minute info. The same situation happened to me once but every case is different, so I cant really guide you on what to do but if you arrange to see an adviser they may lead you in the right direction. Good luck.

Missed opportunity for someone. Supposedly not the nicest of blokes but he should have been a regular in the Scotland squad for me. Natural goalscorer. Nice passer. Shame he got stuck in a Hibs side that changed from the passing game to a lug-it-into-the-corner, fastest-man-boots-it-into-the-centre tactics. Destroyed a Hibs side with Miller, Riordan, Rankin and de Graaf, all with a crick in their neck from looking up at the ball soaring over. Can't believe Petrie thinks Calderwood is worth compensation, rather than him paying his taxi fare to Nottingham or Brum.

This IMO is a very good signing for them. I have much more confidence in them this season after last years attempts to relocate the cowdenbeath team to Paisley. At the moment i think we've got to be one of the favourites for the drop.