Value for Money

[CaleyD]

Husband and wife are out shopping and as they go through the aisles the husband puts a case of Stella in the trolley.

The wife takes it out, puts it back on the shelf and says at ?10 it costs too much.

Further round she takes a jar of face cream at puts it in the trolley.

The husband takes it out and puts it back on the shelf saying that at ?20 it costs too much.

"But", she argues....."it makes me look so sexy"

He replies......"So does the Stella, and it was only half the price"

[Connie.Orr]

.....A guy got home early from work and caught his wife at it with a neighbour.

He pulled the cheating swine from the bed and hauled him out the back and into the garden shed.

He slapped his member in the vice and tightened it until it had a firm grip, dismantled the handle then reached up for an old rusty saw that hung amongst the cobwebs.

The perpetrator screamed, No no your not going to saw it off please!"

"No", replied the avenger, "You are - I'm going to set the shed on fire."