Null Points for Indiana Jones and the Temple of Shyte...

[Canada Bob]

Went to the Pictures last night to watch the latest Indiana Jones thing, Crystal Skull or something, a better title would have been "The Temple of Shyte", sigh...

Started of with the usual flashes and bangs, but it was slapstick more than even remotely believeable, well if you've not in short pants that is  :017:

Included in the initial scene was how Indian Jones saved himself from an Atomic blast {at the other end of the street} by hiding in a {lead lined} fridge !!! who the **** makes lead lined fridges  :017: and how do you get them home ? one the bus ?

I've seen some shyte on the telly and in some movies, but the crap in this movie takes beggars even an 8 year olds belief, part of that being Gold coins whizzing through the air to some giant magnet thing, seems that the movie was half way through filming when someone must have pointed out that gold aint magnetic, ffs...

After the bangs and flashes of the first 10 minutes the next scene {that seems to go on forever} seems totally unrelated to the opening scene, where the actors just talk to one another, possibly waiting for the writers strike to end, so that the clueless b*ggars {by this time that includes the audience} is wondering what the plot is going to be...

45 minutes into the saga we get the poor mans version of Michael Jacksons Thriller scenes, by now I'm not on me own thinking that the projectionist has put the wrong friggin reel on...

An hour into it, and folks are starting to ask each other "what's it all about"  :017: I can't figure it, the plot is infantile, the movie is disjointed, I've finished me malteesers and I'm wondering why the **** I'm not already on me way home... At that point I got up and walked out, mind you we weren't the first, as we left you could hear folks groaning in disbelief at the slapstick events...

Gotta be the worst Big Ticket movie I've seen in the last 10 years, first time I've walked out on a movie that's for sure, it's one of those movies that's not even worth downloading...

If you're thinking of going, stay home, the money is better in your pocket than Harrison Ford's or Spielbergs pocket, hard to believe they'd put their names to this crock of shyte, mind you, money compensates for embarrassment don't it...

Canada Bob.

[Scotty]

not to mention the 68 continuity errors or factual errors like the motorbike that wasnt available till 2000 or the existence of Belize in the film rather than British Honduras as it would have been at the time.

http://www.moviemistakes.com/film7362

[kencar]

Settle down lads, Star Wars wasn't a documentary  :004:

[Scotty]

It wasnt ??? next you will tell me that Santa Clause isnt real ..... meanie  :blah01:

[kencar]

bad dates indy  :004:

I've just watched a truly horrendous BBC 4 documentary about children's beauty pageant 's which scared the bejus out of me  and I've lost my usual easy going approach to life..  :007:

[Connie.Orr]

    "what's it all about"  I can't figure it,

Typical Canadan response, I believe.    :001:  :023:

[Canada Bob]

    "what's it all about"   I can't figure it, Typical Canadan response, I believe.    :001:  :023:

Aye, if only it was as simple as that Connie, as a Wiginer I wasnae impressed either, add to that the following folks {from around the world} had much the same thing to say...

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics...s-premiere.html

http://blogcritics.org/archives/2008/05/29/181454.php

http://www.stuff.co.nz/sundaystartimes/4559357a19798.html

http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertai...12a-835776.html

http://desicritics.org/2008/05/28/103719.php

http://www.9news.com/life/entertainment/to...x?storyid=92331

http://www.northbynorthwestern.com/2008/05...ving-in-indy-4/

http://www.parsonssun.com/pages/full_story...&open=&

My guess is, if yer 8 years old, still in short pants, and have nae yet learned how to play with yer willy, you'll find this movie utterly breath taking...

Canada {for that read Wigin too} Bob.

[Connie.Orr]

Hi CB - Was pulling your leg buddie!! 

[Scotty]

Surprisingly perhaps, but despite a lot of bad reviews, RottenTomatoes.com (the very best film site) rates it at 78% which is decent enough .....

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/indiana_jo..._crystal_skull/

[Scarlet Pimple]

Here in Canada, if there is no a screw loose, then there is a Moose loose aboot the hoose. :003:

So go easy on us Canucks ,we are a challenged race of hybrids, cross-breds, Metis , Cree, Mohawk, Haida and multi-cultural cross-dressing wannabes.  :002:

Keep winding them up Bob. :015:

Man oh man I hope I have as much time as you to spend on such crap as this when I retire (as in stop working in any profession, line of work, gainful employment, ) this evening, 31 May 2008, a date that will live in my mind forever. Come to think about it I can see that retirement is in fact gainful unemployment. :016:

[Canada Bob]

Hi CB - Was pulling your leg buddie!! 

I know that Connie, I was just attempting to vent my spleen about the movie, worst I've seen in a long time, only that crap that Sting did years ago about some bleedin worm in the desert got me on my feet faster asking for a refund, and I did, and I got it. I've tolerated some shyte movies in me time, but this one insults the intellect of the cinema goers... No offence taken Connie, and none meant, text don't always carry the sentiment that we intend...

Canada {yet still Wigin} Bob.

PS... by the way, did you put yer name down to for Naps Comp ? there's 3,500 quid up for grabs this time around...

[Canada Bob]

Here in Canada, if there is no a screw loose, then there is a Moose loose aboot the hoose. :003:

So go easy on us Canucks ,we are a challenged race of hybrids, cross-breds, Metis , Cree, Mohawk, Haida and multi-cultural cross-dressing wannabes.  :002:

Keep winding them up Bob. :015:

Man oh man I hope I have as much time as you to spend on such crap as this when I retire (as in stop working in any profession, line of work, gainful employment, ) this evening, 31 May 2008, a date that will live in my mind forever. Come to think about it I can see that retirement is in fact gainful unemployment. :016:

Get back up yer ladder Rod, yerv missed a bit in that corner  :004:

Canada Bob.

[Scarlet Pimple]

Feck the corner Bob--I have just fallen off the ladder permanently.....

As for Mrs Jones and her three car garage in the British Properties (the most expensive Real Estate in Canada)--you know the bird who dragged me three miles up the winding hill to get a free estimate and when I had given it to her she replied in an aggressive indignant tone of voice""sniff ( that's in for effect) why are you so expensive"?  To which I replied with lips pursed in anger..." not as expensive as that Mercedes parked there in the garage"!.

There was a stunned silence as her face turned blue with discomfort and and resentment but she could not think of a word to say. BUT SUDDENLY ,HER HUBBY  WHO WAS STANDING THERE WATCHING THE ACTION,  BURST OUT LAUGHING HIS HEAD OFF AS I THOUGHT  ."YOUR'E A SPORT LAD BUT JUST WAIT TILL SHE GETS YOU INSIDE THE HOUSE..IT'LL BE THE SOFA FOR YOU ALONE TONIGHT  MATE".

I GUESS HER $1,000 DOLLAR A MONTH ALLOWANCE HAD BEEN EARMARKED FOR A NEW DRESS OR A NEW PAIR OF GUCCI SHOES AND she was thinking THIS  MAN CAME UP TO MY PALACE AND SPOILED IT ALL.

I will, also miss this one from the plebs who live down below in Ambleside village who told me that the very rich who  park their cars outside in the Winter a mile up on the top of the hill make a point of driving down to shop the next day after a snowfall to do their shopping in Ambleside so that these same plebs can see the snow on the top of the car to remember who is the successful  top :dancing01:.. :015:

On the other hand my customer the Lieutenant Governor of the Province of British Columbia, and his wife,amongst others, was a though gentleman  and lady when they greeted me to do  a wee jobbie for them.

Don't think there is no class snobbery in Canada--it's ALL about money here.! :029: