For the ladies!

[Northern_jaggie]

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all

dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?"

I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that ***** knows I'm smarter than her.

Alright girls. Repost this if you agree. **** even if you disagree, repost it.

Men, repost this because you have balls.. I do..

[Mee]

men think with their head ..

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Which head would that be?

[Northern_jaggie]

lol mee!now now we know lads only have one head. The other ones technically a helmet.

[Johnboy]

Can't beat a bit of head..... :003:

[Guest kcj]

:006: Oh verrrrry funny joke...yawn :evil05:

[Johnboy]

Almost as bad as your George Bush joke....!! :020:

[Guest kcj]

Away!!!!!! Nu'hing wrong with my GB joke...OK you give me your 'for the ladies' joke and I'll raise you this one:

Three Englishmen are in a pub and spot a Scotsman at the bar. The first

one says he's going to wind the Scotsman up. So he walks over to

the Scotsman, taps him on the shoulder and says "Hey Jock, I hear your

St. Andrew was a p00f."

"Oh aye really? Hmm, I didnae ken that."

Puzzled, the Englishman walks back to his buddies. "I told him St. Andrew

was a p00f and he didn't care!"

"You just don't know how to set him off, watch and learn" says his friend.

So this second Englishman walks over and taps the Scotsman on the

shoulder. "Hey Jock, I hear your St.Andrew was a transvestite p00f!"

"Jings, I didnae ken that either! Cheers pal."

Shocked beyond belief, the Englishman goes back to his buddies. "You're

right. He's unshakeable!" But the third Englishman says "No, no, no,

I'll really p'ss him off, you just watch." So he wanders over to the Scotsman, taps him on the shoulder and says "Hey Jock, I hear your St. Andrew was an Englishman!"

"Aye, so yer mates were sayin....

[Johnboy]

Now that's much better....!!!

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[f*ballers wife]

"Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

oh my!!!

can't you just love me for what i do for you in the bedroom....? :021: :004:

[Johnboy]

I do, FW, I do.... In fact we all love what you do in the bedroom.... :001: :001:

[f*ballers wife]

I do, FW, I do.... In fact we all love what you do in the bedroom.... :001: :001:

oh my!!!

yes sweeti... but not ALL of you at ONCE.... :018:

well, there WAS the ONE time.... :004:

[Johnboy]

You are just so accommodating - a brilliant squad player....!!

:003: :003:

[f*ballers wife]

oh my!!!

a girl trys her best you know! :love12:

[Johnboy]

You always give 100% FW - and you can't ask for more than that....

watch out for CC - you always give just the kind of comittment he's looking for....!!

[f*ballers wife]

oh my!!!

but the big question is..... could CC keep UP with me... or AFFORD me, if it COMES to that! :love07:

[Johnboy]

Probably neither......

[Guest kcj]

"but the big question is..... could CC keep UP with me... or AFFORD me, if it COMES to that"

Well, he could die happy tryin' ! :021:

[f*ballers wife]

Well, he could die happy tryin' ! :021:

oh my!!!

and WHAT a way to GOOOOOOO................

and the HEAD lines would put prescotts romping in the old news column.... :021:

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